…curve ball…

It’s happened again…just when things are going well, something comes out of the blue and ruins it all…

I’ve only been here for about 3 weeks, but already, something’s happened that’ll make my time here that much more difficult. My mom just told me today that my dad’s gonna be losing his job pretty soon. Apparently, business has been really slow and the owners are planning to sell the business, which means my dad needs to find another job. I don’t think it’d be that difficult if it weren’t for the fact that my dad has only had that one job his whole time here. On top of that, he has only a high school education and limited English proficiency, so it’ll be that much harder to get a new job. Shit, I feel so helpless right now. If I had known about this, I wouldn’t have gone abroad, I’d have stayed back in Berkeley where I’d at least have a job and wouldn’t be a burden on them. Damn it, I feel so handicapped. This sucks, but I gotta stay positive…

…a new day…

No matter how much I talk or think about it, it still hasn’t sunk in that I’m in my last semester of college and that I’ll be graduating when I get back home to the States. I’m not quite sure what I’ll be doing with my three degrees, but in reflecting back on my time in college, I can’t say that I have too many regrets or disappointments with what I’ve accomplished. I feel that I have gotten the most I can possibly get out of an institution, and from here, it’s up to me to put the skills I’ve acquired into practice. I think I’m ready to take on the real world. This entry is still premature, and I should probably wait until I actually walk in May before posting this up, but I feel that it’s finally starting to hit me now, and I did want to comment on this feeling…

So Berkeley’s been a rollercoaster ride for me. I can remember back to high school when we were all scrambling to fill out our college applications. I had no intention whatsoever of going to Berkeley, but it’s strange how fate steps in to guide you. I was totally planning on going to the east coast for the Ivies, and Berkeley was merely another box that I was checking on the UC application. I checked it because of its reputation as being the best UC and all that jazz, but it never crossed my mind that that checked box would be the first step in my long journey at Berkeley. Four and a half years later, I’m sitting here in my dorm room in Hong Kong reflecting on it all, my how time has flown!

I’ve learned a lot at Cal, both in and outside of the classroom. From Cold War politics to Black/White paradigms, from voting patterns to the Model Minority Myth, the theories and concepts that I’ve learned are now part of my intellectual repository that will hopefully prove useful later on in my academic endeavors. That aside though, these theories and concepts are but a fraction of the most important lessons learned in my time at Cal. The friendships I’ve found, the organizations that I’ve been a part of, and the struggles I’ve encountered are what mean the most to me now. APC, CalPerfs, CalSO, IGS, Cal Q&A, X20s, LYRIC, BCSA, BIYUTI, KDR: these are the people who’ve shaped me to be the person that I am today. These people have taught me about who I am, who I want to be, and what I need to do to get to that point. There are few times in our life when we actually take the opportunity to thank those who’ve had a hand in molding our futures, so I figure now is as good a time as any. I don’t want to say that only the people affiliated with these organizations have been influential in my life, but I do want to acknowledge the importance of these groups in building my internal infrastructure. As for individuals, there have been many, most of them know who they are, but I’ll mention them anyway:

- My family: thanks for everything!

- Ericson: so much patience, so much fun, so much tolerance, it’s amazing to see how our friendship has grown. Here’s to many more years!

- John Maze: through thick and thin girl, you’ve been there. There are few that I can count as a life-long friend, and I’m very fortunate to consider you one of them.

- Fred and Kim: my roots…I’ve known you guys the longest, and you’ve stood by me through it all. I could never picture my life without you guys and I’m so grateful we’re still friends!

- Thery: you know I love ya girl!

- Evo: my other from a different mother, I know that no matter where life takes us, you’ll be right there fighting the good fight with me!

- Ritchie, Josh, Justin, Herb: who could ask for a better set of partners in crime?!

- Christopher: there were good times, there were bad times, but through it all, the memories remain and I’m forever grateful for them. I’ve grown in ways I never thought possible, so thank you: for Apple, for film, for teaching me how to love myself, others, and how to be loved…

I’m headed for Macao next week, then it’s off to Bangkok for Chinese New Year. The sun’s rising here in the East, and a new journey is just beginning. Who’ll the new characters be in this new chapter of my life? Only time will tell…

…bored in class…

I’m in my Business Law class right now and it’s incredibly boring. The professor is supposed to be teaching in English, but he only does so about a third of the time; the rest of the time he’s essentially explaining each of the concepts in Cantonese to the other students in the class. I’m the only international student here, but because I blend it very easily, I’m overlooked altogether, how fun. Fortunately, he gave us all an outline of everything he’ll be covering the whole semester, so I’ll just read that and I should be fine. The professor sounds a lot like my youngest uncle in Australia though, although this guy is far more annoying…

I didn’t go to my Cantonese class today. My alarm went off, but I got up to turn it off, then went right back to sleep. I woke up again in time to get to class, but I just didn’t feel like getting up because I was so warm in my bed. I did my laundry and cleaned up my whole room yesterday, it felt good to see my room clean again. I really should try to keep it orderly more often, but it’s just such a hassle. Yesterday was relaxing though, didn’t do too much, but I went to play tennis with Johnny. Johnny’s a Singaporean student who’s on my college tennis team. He’s sweet and cute in his own way. I need to figure out whether or not he’s family though. I’m thinking he is, but not quite sure. Argh, darn Asian boys, why can’t they be easier to decipher?!

Cultural Observation: Asian women are robust!
It seems that true gender parity exists here. Women don’t really get treated differently here. They are no real distinctions between what a man’s job is, and what a woman’s job is, they just do what needs to be done, period. I was walking around Wan Chai a couple of days ago and saw lots of women in the field of construction. They were carrying carts of bricks, working the jack hammers, etc. I was impressed, quite shocked, but impressed nonetheless…

…didya know…

I normally don’t do these things, but I thought this was fairly interesting and figured, why not?!

Taken from Eric M.’s xanga…

TEN Random Things About Me
10. I’m a shoe whore with 90+ pairs of shoes
9. I can fit into kids clothes
8. I can speak 7 languages, 4 fluently and 3 conversationally
7. I love athletics, especially tennis
6. I’m a shop-aholic
5. I’m a perfectionist and am my biggest critic
4. Women’s breasts scare me
3. I’m a work-aholic
2. I’m a hopeless romantic
1. I don’t know how to ride a bike

NINE Places I’ve Visited
9. Zurich, Switzerland
8. Sydney, Australia
7. Hong Kong
6. Battambang, Cambodia
5. Tokyo, Japan
4. Khao-I-Dang, Thailand
3. Cairns, Australia
2. Wiesbaden, Germany
1. Lyon, France

EIGHT Things I want to do before I die
8. Skydive
7. Go bungee jumping
6. Make sure my parents are set for life
5. Have kids
4. Visit all 7 continents
3. Rival Imelda Marcos’ shoe collection
2. Learn to ride a darn bike!
1. Come out to my parents

SEVEN Ways to win my heart (only seven?!)
7. Confidence: knows how to carry himself in all cases–on the dance floor, in a conversation, etc.
6. Believes in me and loves me for all that I am, faults and all
5. Thinks with his heart, and acts on it
4. Is intelligent, both in and out of the classroom (aka common sense)
3. Ambitious and has direction
2. Believes in US, and Is willing to grow TOGETHER in a relationship
1. Is honest and faithful

SIX Things I believe in
6. Equality for ALL
5. The right to disagree
4. Personal responsibility and accountability
3. Me
2. The future
1. Love

FIVE Things I’m afraid of
5. Loneliness
4. Losing my family and/or friends
3. Having my heart broken…again…
2. Hate and what it’s capable of making people do
1. Dying with regrets

FOUR of my Favorite Items in my dorm room:
4. My iPod
3. My Homer Simpson slippers
2. Pictures of my family and friends
1. My Powerbook

THREE Things I do everyday
3. Talk to my friends and family
2. Shower, brush, floss, etc.
1. Tell a family member/friend how much I appreciate them

TWO Things I am trying not to do right now:
2. Overspend
1. Procrastinate

ONE Person I want to see right now:
1. My nana

…moderation…

I can’t believe it, my second week is already done! Time really flies when you’re not in the States, hehe. So let me recap this week…

So our university is divided into separate colleges, based on some arbitrary criteria. Anyhow, I belong to United College; the other ones are Chung Chi, New Asia, and Shaw College. On Tuesday, United was having its tennis try-outs. I thought it would be fun to go try-out, but I totally left my rackets and shoes at home, but fortunately, they had rackets that I could borrow, and my trusty Diesels had non-marking soles–too bad they’re not all that conducive for playing tennis though. Anyhow, so I get there and I try-out. Next thing you know, I’m on the college team playing singles, and on the university team as well. Craziness! It should be fun though, just a bit rough because practice for the college team is right before practice for the university team on Tuesdays and Thursdays–4 hours of straight tennis each of those nights–AHHHHH!!! Oh well, fortunately there’s a cute guy on each of my teams, hehe, good times! Speaking of which, I think the one on my college team is family. Last night at practice, he was watching me the whole time, and then when I’d look back at him, he’d have this like bright beaming smile on his face, it was cute, hehe. After practice on Thursday, he came up to me after our team huddle and asked me if I wanted to hit with him next Wednesday, then asked for my phone number. Hmmm, I won’t count my chickens before they’re hatched, but I think I was hit on! (fingers crossed)

Wednesday night, I was really sore and tired from tennis practice the night before. I hadn’t hit in about half a year or so and the guy freakin’ made me play 4 solid hours of tennis to gauge how good I was, not cool. Anyhow, Jenny and Don convinced me to go out clubbing with them that night. I was kinda wasn’t feeling in the mood, but after some drama from back home, I decided that I should go so I could clear my mind. We went to this one club in Wan Chai called Venue because it was Ladies’ Night. So there wasn’t a cover charge when we got there, but it was empty. The guys and I left to 7-Eleven to get our booze on because it’s cheaper there, but then when we got back in, the waitresses were on us like Bush is on idiocy about when and what we were going to buy to drink. I told the waitress that we had just come in and we’d need a couple of minutes first, but she kept pushing us to order or leave. HOW RUDE! Whatever, so I decide to order a coke, and she pretended not to hear me and asked me again. I said it louder, and she looked at me and was like, “Coke?!” I retorted back, “Um, yeah, you know, COCA-COLA!” The bitch had the audacity to roll her eyes at me, charge me $45 HK, and give me attitude. OH HELLLLL NO! :!@#$: I’m soooo never going there again. UGH, STRAIGHT CLUBS! Anyhow, the music kinda sucked and I thank god we went in a big group because the guys there were gross, the waitresses were bitches, and hardly anyone knew how to dance. What a waste of time! Fortunately, Thursday made up for the shitty time on Wednesday night…

Yesterday, Katy and I went to Causeway Bay to try to find the ever elusive Apple Store. There’s no real Apple Store here in Asia, but what they have are pockets of Apple retailers, so it’s not a total loss. I had to bring my iPod in for servicing there, so it was a great opportunity to see what new things Apple had in person. So we get to Causeway Bay and it was kinda gloomy. The whole day was actually gloomy and dark, but it was starting to clear up though. Anyhow, I was under the impression that I didn’t have any practice that evening, so Katy and I basically had the whole day to just wander aimlessly wherever we wanted, but I was wrong. We got to the Apple retailer and I totally bought this nifty keyboard skin for my PowerMac. I’d have gotten the one for my Powerbook as well, but they didn’t have the clear one, and I didn’t want a blue one, so I figured I’d wait until they got the next shipment in. It was cool though. We headed down to McDonald’s after that because I wanted to check out what new Happy Meals toy they were selling this month. I’m so totally glad we went because they have this special collection of Chinese Zodiac stuffed animals that they were selling since Chinese New Year is coming up. They split up the 12 signs into 3 weeks, so I was only able to get a third of the collection at that one time, but I’ll be back to get the other 8 animals later, hehe, yay for happy meal toys!

So while we were at the McDonald’s though, as I was ordering my toys and ice cream, I happened to look over to my right to see one of the HOTTEST guys at Berkeley ordering at the register next to me. I was like, OMG! I turned to Katy and tried to play it cool. I said to her, “hey, he goes to Berkeley.” She didn’t believe me, so I used that as an excuse to talk to him and prove her wrong. I was like, “hey, don’t you go to Berkeley?” He was a bit startled, but yup, it was him alright! His name is Sean, and OMG was he beautiful! He was a counselee when I was a CalSO counselor and there’s no way I could ever forget a hottie like him. WOW, he totally made my day, hehe. Anyhow, Katy and I kicked ourselves for not taking a picture with him to take back to Jenny to show her what my type is, lol, oh well, another time. He’s actually from here, so he’s an international student at Berkeley. Anyhow, hopefully he’ll be here a little longer so I can “accidentally” bump into him again.

So after the magical experience at McDonald’s, we decided to roam about the area a bit. We went to Harbour Road to check out Star Ferry and the Convention Center, then went up to one of the tallest and most beautiful hotel buildings in the area. The view was absolutely breathtaking and had it been a clear and sunny day, it would have been a perfect view of all of Hong Kong, but even with the weather being all nasty, it was still incredible! Our stomachs were finally beginning to tire of the sightseeing though, and were crying out for food. We wandered about and found this one place called Kumamoto. WOW, can you say DELICIOUS?! While you’re at it, shout out the word CHEAP too, lol. The food was absolutely fantastic and the price was unbeatable. I ordered spaghetti in a cream cheese sauce with baked salmon on top, Japanese fried dumplings, and freshly squeezed orange juice, and Katy had banana pancakes, then steamed chicken and noodle soup with shitake mushrooms. SOOOOO GOOOOD, and it was only $92 HK for the both of us, that’s like $13 US!! FOR BOTH OF US!!! I’m definitely going back there again! Unfortunately, we had to head back to campus because in the middle of the meal, my tennis coach called me up and told me that we had practice, poo. Ah well, it was fun while it lasted, and tennis wasn’t so bad anyway since Johnny was there and I got hit on, hehe…

Today was a really pleasant day, minus the nasty cold weather that is. I only had Cantonese today, and afterwards, our whole class went to the staff canteen and had dim sum. It was really awesome and I tried chicken feet for the first and LAST time; it’s an acquired taste that I sincerely doubt I’ll ever acquire. Everything else was pretty normal, and very good, particularly the mango pudding–YUM! I love my Cantonese class. Even though it ruins my plans for having a 4 day weekend, it’s worth it because my professor is so cool, and we have dim sum after class at least once a week, hehe. I guess word got out that food is my friend, and good cheap food at that!

Jenny and I went to Mong Kok afterwards. She had to get some shoes and I wanted to check on some new tennis rackets that I just ordered online and am having shipped out to me. I bought two new Prince More Attack OS tennis rackets, and it turns out that I should have bought all 4 because it was such a great deal! Darn, but I still got a great deal nonetheless. I can’t wait til they get here, I’m sooooo jazzed! I wound up staying in Mong Kok to wait for Don, Kevin, Vannak, and Heidi. We all decided to go to Sham Shui Po, the discount electronics district, just to see what they had there and I also needed to buy a transformer. I got the cheapy one though and I think I’m gonna have to go back and get the better one because I may have the voltage wrong on this one; it’s also better to invest in a more reliable and expensive one when you have valuable electronic devices hooked up to it. We had dinner at this one Chinese restaurant that was ok. It wasn’t amazing, but it was edible, just a bit tasteless. It’s ok though, we all wound up going to McDonald’s to get ice cream afterwards anyway, hehe. Yay for $2 HK soft serve ice cream, hehe…

So today marks another good day of just being able to wander with wreckless abandonment of time. I like not having any responsibilities and just being able to do whatever I want again without being tied down to anything. So this is what it feels like to be a kid. I think I like it…

…Mong Kok-ed out…

YAY! I just woke up and it’s 11:35 am over here! I’ve been having difficulty sleeping past 8 am over here this whole week, so I finally forced myself to try to sleep beyond that today since I didn’t have anything to do; I’m happy to report that it worked and hopefully my sleep cycle will be much more normal now…

I’ve been going to Mong Kok a lot. Mong Kok is where people go to get a lot of cheap stuff like cell phones (although it’s not really cheap at all, just cheaper than the stores), clothes, good food (of course), and great desserts! There’s this one dessert place called Healthy Desserts that’s just fabulous! OMG, their mango jelly drink is just sooooo good, I can’t get enough of it!! I need to find one that’s closer to campus though, I’d prefer to not have to travel all the way to Mong Kok (about 5 KCR stops from the University), but if I can’t find it, then I don’t mind it so much since it’s sooooo good. I really have to limit my dessert intake though, I’m having so many sweets, not to mention food, hehe. Argh, the difficulties of trying to gain “good” weight (i.e. muscle). Ah well, in the mean time, food is my friend, hehe.

I finally went clubbing on Friday night. We went to Wan Chai first to these bars to celebrate my friend, Thomas’ birthday. He got trashed a bit too quickly, and within an hour’s time or so, he could hardly walk by himself. Don and Jamil had to carry him down to the MTR because he still wanted to go clubbing with us. Eh, whatever, it was his birthday, guess he could get smashed if he really wanted to. So we headed out to Lan Kwai Fong after the bars because we all wanted to dance. Thank goodness we went because it renewed my hope for cute bois in HK, lol. There was definitely a concentration there, although I wasn’t sure which ones were straight and which ones were gay still, hehe, give me another week! We went to C Club. Aside from the smoking inside and the horny and nasty straight boys there, the music was totally great and it was an awesome venue. Straight boys are funny though. My friends and I totally took over the dance floor and made a big circle in which we battled in the center. The straight guys watched from the outside and kept scooting in closer to the girls to try to dance with them, hoping that some would respond and start backing their asses up, but to no avail, hehe. Just when the guys were about to touch pelvic to ass, my friends would pull me and we’d start freaking in front of the guy, lol, good times, hehe. This one local girl was hitting on me though, and I didn’t have the heart to tell her I was gay, lol. She kept trying to talk to me and pulling me in to freak with her, poor clueless girl, lol. Anyhow, we took a taxi home and it was soooo cheap. There were 5 of us and we split the bill, HK$35 each, which was like $6 US each–craziness! Yes, that was good times, but bring on the gay bois and the gay clubs!!!

So we went on a tour of HK yesterday, visiting various historic sites and temples like Man Mo Temple, Lam Tsuen Wishing Tree, and Lung Yeuk Tau Heritage Trail. Man Mo Temple was where they honored the Gods of Literature and War. I was kind of irritated when we went here because I knew that people were going to be true tourists and snap pictures of everything…

DISCLAIMER: you DO NOT take pictures OF or IN the temple, it’s sacrilegious.

Additionally, you don’t take pictures of people while they’re praying. I don’t go around taking pictures of you praying to your gods, why would you take a picture of me praying to mine?! Ugh, I swear, just because you’re on vacation doesn’t mean you can turn off your common sense. Please people, stop perpetuating the stereotype of stupid Americans! I don’t mind that people come visit these temples, but at least have the decency to respect what it stands for and not treat it, or the people who pray in it, like novelty items just so you can have something to remember the place by–not cool.

So after the temple, we went to the Wishing Tree. This was an interesting place because it’s definitely the only of its kind. So supposedly, you go to this tree when you want to have your wish granted, whether it be for love, money, or whatever. So when you get there, you’re supposed to buy these ceremonial papers that are tied to an orange. You’re supposed to throw the orange up into this tree and hope that it hangs on the tree somehow. If it stays in the tree, then your wish will more than likely be granted. If it falls, then you can try again, but you get no more than 3 trees, after that, you might as well give up, hehe. I got mine up on the 2nd try, so I’m looking forward to getting my wish granted! The real fun was in watching the people try to get their oranges into the tree though. It was such a hilarious sight. As soon as I figure out how to add a QuickTime file to my journal, I’ll post up a clip of what was going on there. It was fun though. There’s nothing like the sight of people getting pelted by oranges to make your day!

The heritage trail was the last thing on our list. They advertised it as a hike, but it really wasn’t. We were walking on a cemented road the whole time, and we were just passing by people’s homes and what not. Eh, I got some good pictures that juxtaposed industrialization and rural life though, so it wasn’t a total bummer.

So that was the end of the tour. All in all, it was a pretty interesting day and I did get to meet more people in the program. This semester is starting to really take form, and looks to be pretty darn cool. I think I’m going to join the tennis team here, but I need to find a hitting partner to warm up for try-outs. I also want to take an archery class as well, so watch out people! Soon I’ll be able to shoot an arrow through an apple! Yay, there’s nothing like the realization of a fantasy–Robin Hood, men in tights, here I come!

The adventures continue…

…immigrant woes…

Ok, so being an immigrant here sucks! I went to Wan Chai today to the Immigration Department so I could get my multiple re-entry visa to China, but it turned out to be a fiasco…

We arrived in Wan Chai at like 11:45 and apparently, people like to shut things down for lunch around here, so from 12-2, lots of government and university offices are closed. Anyhow, we decided we would go eat first, then head over to the Visa Office. We went into this one little eatery, but when we sat down, there weren’t any pictures, nor was there any English translation on the menu, so we were clueless. I tried to speak to them in Mandarin, but they didn’t understand that either, so we were stuck. We didn’t want to just eat anything, so we got up and left. So this is what it feels like to have a language barrier, a lot of cluelessness. Anyhow, so we find this one Japanese place with lots of pictures–good times. We decide to go in and eat there. Ok, pictures are only good if they’re accurate. All the items looked so good, but why was it that when I got my order, it was only like HALF of what I ordered?! I felt sooooo jipped, not cool people, not cool! I was still really hungry so we went to a bakery afterwards and I loaded up on baked goods. OMG, their baked goods were sooooo delicious! The bakery wound up being a constant part of our excursion…

So when we got to the Visa office, they told us that we couldn’t get a multiple re-entry visa unless we had a Hong Kong ID, which is only given to people who will be here for more than 180 days. Ok, so then we decided that we would go to the HKID office to try to get an HKID. I got an agent who wasn’t really paying attention to the date on my passport visa and got an application, but my friends decided to stand by me while I was getting this and proceeded to immediately ask for the same thing. I was just about to start filling out the application when the clueless agent finally caught on and had my friends call me back to give back the damn application! UGH! I WAS SOOOO CLOSE! I was really bitter because I knew that going in a group was going to decrease our chances of getting around this whole ordeal. Anyhow, so we got rejected then for an HKID, but she suggested that we go extend our visa so we could qualify for an HKID then. So we went down to the Visa Extension Office. When we got there, the retarded official told us that it’s not possible because our academic term ends in June, so there would be no reason for us to stay longer, and that if we wanted to extend our visa, we weren’t allowed to apply for an extension until a couple of weeks before it was about to expire. In short, no HKID, no multiple re-entry visa, SOOOO MUCH MORE EXPENSIVE! The Hong Kong government is sooooo retarded! Argh! If only my stupid friends hadn’t ruined it for me, I was soooo gonna slip through the cracks and get my HKID, damn! Oh well, I’ll try the travel agency next…

After the open-handed rejection by the Immigration Department, we all decided to go to Mong Kok. I wanted to check out their cell phones because Eva and I are going to get me a cellie tomorrow, FINALLY! Mong Kok was crazy as usual. We went to Ladies’ Market and then tried to find this one crazy cell phone plaza/mall that sold cell phones at like half the price, but Don couldn’t remember the location. After walking around in circles for over 2 hours, we finally found it, but I’m still not sure whether I should buy an expensive phone and bring it back to the States with me or just buy a cheapie phone and throw it away afterwards. Argh, indecision will be the death of me yet! Oh well, I’ll sleep on it tonight and figure it out tomorrow when I go with Eva. I just hope I can remember where it is. I wanted to get a new pair of tennis rackets as well, but for some strange reason, the malls here don’t have like sporting goods stores in them, ugh! Well, we’ll see if I can find any good rackets tomorrow…

All in all, today was a rather disappointing day. Didn’t really accomplish anything, so most of it was wasted, ugh! Whatever, I got to know Mong Kok a little better. I am still hungry though, hmmm…I wonder if the canteens are still open…damn, nevermind, they’re closed already, poo…

I just got my schedule, I wound up getting all the classes that I wanted, YAY! It’s good to know that all my walking and strife these past couple of days hasn’t gone to waste. I have my first Cantonese class tomorrow, I wonder what it will be like. A lot of the people here are taking Mandarin, but I figure I can just take Mandarin when I get back to the States. Besides, Cantonese will be much more useful to me here since that’s what everyone speaks here. I tried speaking Mandarin to some of the people today to ask where that cell phone mall/plaza was, but I got so many confused looks back at me. Ah well, yay for new languages! Ok, I’m hungry, time for food…

OMG! I almost forgot…

I SAW CUTE BOIS! THEY DO EXIST HERE!! WAHOOOO!!!

I am barely half way through my first week here in Hong Kong, and I’m sooooo tired…

Ok, so first of all, classes. Trying to add/drop my classes has been an utter pain in the old rear! So the only class that I really wanted to take while here in HK was a business law course, which was offered to me. Ok, upon arriving here, instead of telling us when the language courses would be beforehand, they schedule it at a time that conflicts with the one and only course that I want and got into. Additionally, they have it scheduled MWF, so that that’s the only course that stands in my way of having a 4 day weekend. This totally freakin’ sucks! Ok, but that’s not the irritating part. So CUHK has this stupid policy of making exchange students go to all the respective departments and get their approval if they want to add that specific course. Doesn’t sound too bad right? Well, it wouldn’t be if it weren’t for the fact that the damn university is built on a damn hill and you literally walk up at least 50-60 flights of stairs and hills before you get anywhere. SOOOOO ANNOYING! Anyhow, the story gets better. So I try to switch sections, the system won’t let me. I try to talk to my advisor, but she’s so slow and can’t really articulate herself all that well, so I just wind up being more confused. I try to talk to another advisor–one that speaks English, and he tells me that I can’t add the new section online, I have to go get the department’s approval. The department tells me that I have to do it online. My Chinglish speaking advisor tells me that I can’t do it at all and must wait. This went on for TWO DAYS!!!! I WAS SOOOOOOO CONFUSED!! It turns out then that because I’m not a business major, I can’t take the course, but for some reason, the Business Administration Department offered me a spot in that course. So I have a spot, but I can’t go to it, but I want it, ARGH!!! THE FRUSTRATION!!!

Ok, so that was the academic side of things. In terms of settling into my room and all, it’s coming together. It’s taken a while, multiple trips out to Shatin Mall, a fried Sonicare toothbrush charger (damn, I have to use a regular toothbrush now), and a huge trip to Ikea, but I’m almost there. YAY! So I also have a real roommate now. Our room is smaller than my room in Berkeley, but whatever it’s cheap. He’s cool. We don’t talk much, he’s usually studying and I’m usually not here, but eh, whatever, we get along. I didn’t explicitly tell him that I’m gay, but I’ve tried to be as obvious as possible: I have my rainbow ribbon displayed quite clearly on my satchel, I have all my research books about queer identity on my bookshelf, and finally, I’ve been trying to surf gay pages whenever he’s in the room, hehe. Whatever, if he wants to say anything, he knows that he’s more than welcome to ask…

So I haven’t really seen any cute guys yet. I know they’re out here somewhere, I just haven’t seen them. I’ll head over to Lan Kwai Fong this weekend and explore to see where the hotties are at though, hehe. Well, this is it for now, I’ll try to keep up my entries, but no promises. Here’s to Hong Kong!

I’m on the plane right now, half-way across the Pacific, and about to write a new chapter of my life…

The culmination of my last semester in Berkeley didn’t go quite as smoothly as I had anticipated. Academically, things were perfectly fine; I didn’t have much trouble whatsoever with my courses and was able to get more involved with the issues and organizations that have been such an integral part of my activist side. It’s funny, though, how the academic part of it all wound up playing second fiddle to my emotions and feelings…

I finally started to date again this semester. There’s a false stress on the “again” because I never really got to date much prior to Chris, so I use the term lightly. In any event, to say that this game is rough is an understatement. Emotions are such an utterly difficult phenomenon, almost as complex as humans themselves. I want to say that after having been in a long term relationship of two years that I know how all of this works, but that would be far from the truth. In terms of dating and understanding how this game works, I’m about as clueless as George W. Bush is about running this country. It’s funny how we meet certain people in our lives and think that they’re “the one,” and yet we’ve hardly lived long enough to even legitimize that notion. We search and search for the most compatible being, but in the process of doing so, our fantasies and dreams escape out of the world in which they exist and project themselves into our reality, onto someone who may not necessarily be the ideal person for us, but whom we’ve willed ourselves to believe is the ideal person. The heart is a cruel, cruel thing. I’ve learned my lesson though…

Through all the trials and tribulations of the heart this semester, I’ve learned that I need to keep my emotions in check. No this doesn’t mean that I’m going to be more reclusive with my feelings, but it does mean that I will be more careful with them. Yes, I want to take risks and chances with people, but those risks will not come with a string attached so tightly to my heart. I think Thery brought up a good point when she made the distinction between a crush and someone you’re truly into–I don’t know what you would call that; I don’t want to say love because it takes more than a chance passing in one’s life before you can actually use that term, but you get the point. It is funny how life and love play out though, you always wind up hurting those you supposedly care for the most…

So here I am, sitting in business class on a flight to Hong Kong where I’ll be staying for a whole semester. I’ve left everything I’ve known–friends, family, familiar surroundings–all for the unknown, for what lies ahead. I can’t say that I’m not scared, but I am ready. I’ve been away from home for 4+ years, lived abroad in Europe, Australia, and now Asia, learned how to love and be loved, felt what it’s like to have your heart broken, and through it all, I’ve survived, albeit a bit battered and bruised. I am ready…

…too sober for my own good…

It’s 6am and I’m fuckin’ awake. I just got back from a “party” that was meant to celebrate our going abroad, but we all wound up drinking a lot, and unfortunately for me, sobering up far too quickly for my own good…I heard everything, I saw everything, and I felt every sliver of pain there was to feel in this world…

I won’t go into the details of tonight, but I am glad that I’m getting the fuck out of Berkeley. This semester has been drama filled and I do not want anything to do with it anymore. More importantly, I’m getting the fuck out of the US and away from all this bullshit. Instead of this being a happy send off, this night has turned my last couple of days in Berkeley into nightmares that I desperately need to wake up from. I’m done. As of Wednesday, I’m done with all of this, and I want nothing to do with it ever. I don’t play games, I don’t fuck around. If that’s what people want, they should fuckin’ go and buy a Monopoly set or a whore, whatever floats your fuckin’ boat, but leave me the fuck alone. The End.